Losing something you were sure of

Have you ever lost something you were sure of?
You ever asked yourself why did that happen?
It's so clear that everyone's too blind to see it.

You lost things because you took them for granted. How foolish of us to do that. And we wonder why our life's so miserable. We're dumb dumb dumb. We wish many things, but we never actually do something  to get them. We sit there in bed looking at the walls, on the window and so on, and wait for something to happen, we wait for miracles. That's why we're unhappy, that's why we always fail.

Some actually get the things they want. Because they worked hard to get them, they deserve. Or maybe it's just fool's luck. But still, even if  achieve something, most of us will soon lose it.

Why? Exactly why I said before, because we take it for granted. When we have something ( a job, a hot body, a great relationship) we act very irrational. We suppose that only because it's ours, we actually possess it. No, that's wrong, you can only possess objects( not even those sometimes), but not people, feelings and other things.
To keep something it's not enough to have it, you gotta work your ass for it, gotta prove every day that you deserve it. Great things go to hardworking people, not to losers.

We lose things because we just let them be, we think they'll stay by themself next to us, in our life. We lose them because once we get them we lose our enthusiam  and we ignore them. Even a cat if you ignore, it will  find someone else to show her love. Trust me, I know what I'm talking about, my cat always does that.

We lose them because we focuse our attention on something else. We take our eyes from them, and wonder after a while, why they dissapeared.

We lose them because we lose control. We're too happy that we've got something, so we usually forget to do something to keep them.
What you have won't be yours if you're not wiling to do your best to keep it.

It might scare you this idea, that you have to work everyday to keep something in your life. What did you thought? How many people did you know happy, with great bodies, well paid jobs, in healthy happy relationships? Why do you think these people are just a few? Because the others do nothing to get what they want, nothing to keep what they have. They lose their time dreaming about the future, making plans of how it will be their lovely house, how great they will feel. They forget you need materials to build a house. If you get materials but you let them outside in the rain, they may be damaged by the raindrops, thieves might  steal them. Being busy dreaming, plannig what you'll do with them, you'll be blind and won't see them when they're gone. When you'll be finished with daydreaming you'll realise you're dream is finished too, because you lost what you needed to build that dream.

Women starve themselves, excercise until they're exhausted till the point they get the body they always dreamed about. And once they get it, they do nothing to keep it. They think they're good looking now so there's no point to keep exercising. Then, after a while, they start eating junks again. And without noticing they will get to the point they started. In the same miserable condition. No cry will bring back what they've lost. Being sorry won't help either.

Happiness  is the same. You can become happy but you gotta do something everyday to keep that state. Happiness does not exist by itself, you're the one who can produce it. And if you're not happy, ask you're self why, what do you need to be happy? Do the things you need to do in order to be happy. But do them now, even tomorrow is too late. Tomorrow is the same thing with never. So the things you plann to do starting tomorrow, it's more likely you will never do them.

You probably wonder why I wrote this. You think it's because of you. But don't get the wrong idea. This is not supposed to be a threat, I'm not that mean. It's more like..well, you can take it as an advice, not in a particular situation, but for life generally.

And besides that, it's because of me. Because I've noticed a change in my mood lately. I'm not as happy as I used to be one or two months ago. My life is not going as well as it used to be. And who's fault is it? Jeeez, don't dare thinking it's your fault. It's only mine. It's my fault that I've lost control of my life. I let myself taken by the waves even if they bumped me into rocks or drowned me. I was happy, to happy to be able to do something. I never tought it could be possible to exist something like that, a happiness wich can be dangerous, that paralyze you and makes you lose everything. So I guess not even happines is good when it's too much.

I was so happy about all the improvements I've made, about all the things that changed in a better way, all the things that I always wanted and finnaly got...so happy that I forgot to keep them. I forgot to do something so they'll be mine further.  Now I feel a little bit unhappy because I realise I'm on my way to lose everything I've worked so hard to get.

But you see, lucky me, I've find out why am I unhappy and now I can be more careful. Now I know it's a damaging attitude to take things for granted. Now I know that if I really want something, if that thing or person is what I need to be happy, I will fight for it to get it, and work hard every day to keep it in my life.

I guess we all saw how a dog keeps a bone in his mouth. Have you ever tried to take his bone? Have you ever succeded? You saw how hard he's holding the bone with his teeth? How he growls when someone gets too close? That's the right attitude. When you wanna keep something you must hold on it with your teeth. You must not let anyone or anything steal what you have/like/love.

Of course it's the same thing in relationships. Mostly men does this mistake. They think it's enough that a woman is their girlfriend. They think she will stick with them forever just because she loves them. ( maybe some women will stick with their men just for love, but do you think a woman like her can be happy?is that what you want, a girlfriend, wife who's life will be empty because you do nothing for her?). It happened to me before, a boy I used to love a lot was surprised when I left him, surprised seeing me with someone else after an year. He probably thought that just because I loved him, I will spend the rest of my life alone. He's sorry now, he apologised, he'd leave his girlfriend for me anytime, but it's too late. He had me and all the things I did for him, but he wasn't able to appreciate, to give anything in return no matter how many times I explained him that his attitude is hurting me, no matter how many ways I've tried, how long I've been patient with him. So, despite of my strong feeling for him, of our long history, I had to leave him, because even if I was happy sometimes, it was a harmful relationship for me.

Men never prove their love. They say something like :"what, isn't the fact the I'm with you a proof that I love you?". It may be for them, but women need proofs day by day. Men say "I love you"  once and think it's enough for the rest of their lifes. That's why they always lose the woman they love. That's why women cheats. (What, did you thought we cheat for sex?No, we always do it for affection and attention, for the things you stoped offering once you took us for granted. We do it because we need someone to remind us how beautiful we are, how lucky he is to have such a woman, because we need to feel loved, wanted, appreciated for the things we do, because we need to hear lovely words, for a hug, a touch wich is done from love, not obligation. These are the things you should've done to keep us by your side, to keep us faithful. Is it that hard? It doesn't cost you anything, It doesn't take to much time, it's not hard/complicated, we don't expect you to be  a pro, we just wanna see you try.)

Yes, I now it sounds scary for men, it sound like women are too demanding. But that's the way it is. We have different needs. For us it's very important to recieve affection/attention. And trust me, it's not that hard to do it once you get used with it. Besides that, don't you think we deserve that much? Think about all the things we do for you, we will  do. Who's gonna wash your socks, cook for you, clean after you, who will go through pain to carry and gave birth to your child? Who's gonna multitask ( take care of you, of the house, of the kids, go to work) while the only thing you'll do is go to work? Who's gonna make you feel a man, raise your confidence, make you strong, carry on your name and genes. A SHE is the one you'll do all these things. She will love and she will prove it by words, by gestures of affection, facts. Why can't you do the same thing?

Does it really seem that hard? In a relationship it takes two to make it work. Don't let all the work on her shoulders. She will try because she's strong and self-sacrifice is in her nature. But it will be hard for her, she will suffer and feel like she's still on her own even though she's with you.  But one day she will fail. Can you ride a bike when only one wheel is spinnig? No, you can't. And so you can't make a relationship work if only one is trying.






P.S: If you don't like what I've said, feel free to tell me, or just ignore it, consider these are just words about general things. Like I said before, it's not a threat. It's just what I  think and what I feel. And I felt the need to share it with you this way. I don't want to repress it because this way, one day, it will turn into a real fight. No matter what I say, how I feel, how hard it is, what you do or won't do, I won't give up. I'm just like that dog. I have the "bone" I want so I'm going to hold on it with my teeth.






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